Contradictions and challenges – How to articulate an evolution

There are (at least) two moments of explicit contradiction in my evolution essay. The first is this: “I was simultaneously looking for and loathing purity.” I can’t find words to tease that out; it was what it was. I don’t feel compelled to dwell on that in this essay. Another moment is at the very end. I say something about knowing that I did it (undergrad) right. The next paragraph says that I am very bad at undergrad-ing. I think both are true…but mostly the latter (ha!).

Regarding challenges, I am finding it difficult to connect each section of the essay. But I am tempted to let that appear evident; I’m tempted to leave the space between the sections be choppy because anything else feels like an engineered attempt to smooth edges that weren’t smooth when I experienced them. Also, I fear that much of the essay (in particular, the beginning) is abstract.  In other words, I am wondering if the essay makes sense to anyone besides me.

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