Honesty hour with Maddy: I am totally freaking out. Maybe it’s because school is finally picking up, or the weather is so chilly, or the career fair is this week, or I can barely find time to think. Regardless, I really just want to curl up in a ball and hide under my covers, ignoring the perpetually loud knock of responsibility constantly tapping at my bedroom door. I mean I am basically channeling my inner Edgar Allan Poe. (Much love for the guy, but we can all agree he was a little insane.) Does anyone else feel as utterly overwhelmed as I do right now? I want to put in as much time as possible into my re-purposing project, but life happens and I am struggling to find the right balance.
On another note, I recently (last Friday) decided to change the topic of my re-purposing project (another reason to add to the ‘Why Maddy is Freaking Out’ list). My new project is based off of a rant I wrote my freshmen year of college when I was hardcore struggling with mental health issues. The rant contains some of the purest and most truthful words I have ever written, and I thought it would be a great starting point for a re-purpose. I ultimately decided that my original re-purposing project of a fashion blog branding how-to guide was too much in my comfort zone of what I already know how to write and write about. I wanted to take a leap and try something entirely new and talk about something I don’t usually talk about: my mental health disorders. I am excited, but also slightly nervous to unveil a personal narrative where I discuss my past, present, and future with mental health. I truly believe speaking about mental health is the only way we can all break the stigma, so I am pumped to be apart of the stigma-fighting movement!
One of the things I am most worried about, however, is the construction of a personal narrative. Right now I find it so tricky because there has to be a balance between personal anecdotes/thoughts and creativity. My research so far has allowed me to see some interesting takes on the personal narrative, such as a poem and a blog entry. But when I think about writing something like that myself, my stomach gets all twisted and this fear of failure starts rushing in. I want my personal narrative to be authentic, yet captivating, and that’s what is so terrifying right now. I am trying to find the place within myself to muster up the courage and confidence to begin such a daunting task. However, I think this challenge will be so much more rewarding even if I do fail. I am scared, I am excited, and I am unsure. But that’s okay. I truly believe the end product will be worth all of the stress.
I guess the one major request I have for the class is to send me any and all personal narratives you have read in the past and loved. I want to gather as many useful models as possible, to hopefully build my confidence in the personal narrative genre and allow me to get started writing sooner, rather than later.