‘What Is Virginity?’ And Other Seemingly Stupid Questions

The more and more I think about it, the more I’m into this idea of writing about sex and sexuality.  Not only has it been a recurring theme in my writing, but having the opportunity to write about it through different lenses and mediums is something I haven’t had the chance to do.  Saying that, I’m hoping to deconstruct the idea of sex through the eyes of LGBT members.  We don’t get the Tutorial, the Orientation most students get with sex.  Even to this day, and mind my language, I’m not sure about the exact procedure for anal sex.  Even the fact I had to say “mind my language” tells you something.

A few questions I hope to stimulate in readers:

  1. What is virginity?
  2. Whose responsibility is it to teach sexual education?
  3. How far is too far for sexual education?
  4. How much can we label and define sexuality?
  5. When am I supposed to tell someone if I have an STD/STI?
  6. Why are guys and girls separated for sexual education?  Should they know both?  What if they’re transgender?
  7. Is sex a right or is it earned at a certain age?
  8. Why and who decides?
  9. Why are there differing levels of emotion attached to sex?
  10. What is sex?

As you can see there are a lot of angles I can take with this very very broad topic.  I’ll most likely omit #5 as a focus point but if I decide to do the fictional piece on a gay relationship I’ll need to include HIV and misconceptions about it and how it ties into curable STDs.

I could easily force the reader to ask these questions by having the characters ask these questions themselves.  That might be too easy and cause the piece to feel less organic and genuine.  This needs to be a realistic snippet of a relationship, not a thought piece and most definitely not an essay.

I think people are more curious than they let on.  I didn’t realize I cared so much about so many things until I came to Michigan and I’m sure others are the same way.  People also jump over definitions way more than than they let on.  We think we know what sex is, and we think we know what virginity is, but when we ask the simple question, “What is it and why is it that way?” we get this sense of dissociation.   The lines are a little more blurred than we think.  I think the reader will most likely have preconceived definitions of these ideas and when I force a different lens and context, their definitions will (hopefully) start to change.


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