So Close, Yet So Far Away

From the moment I was accepted into the Minor for Writing and learned about the Capstone project, I could not wait! Having nearly complete creativity over a project with no topic restrictions sounded inspiring, and I immediately began brainstorming countless ideas. I was so anxious to begin my Capstone class and immerse myself completely in my project. However, now that Capstone is here, it is slightly (a lot )more daunting.    


When I began my project, I was sure that I wanted to pursue a recent dream of mine: creating a television show with strong, influential female hosts discussing significant news and events relating to women. The inspiration behind this show was to create objective news and to create a space for women to get informed and be empowered. As weeks went by in my Capstone course, I continued to grow excited about my project, but it seemed that the more excited I became, the more nervous and uncertain I became as well. For starters, I have no experience in creating TV shows. I do not know what sorts of technology needs to be utilized. I did not know which women I would feature on my show. I did not know which topics I would discuss. Quite frankly, it seemed as though I knew nothing about how to begin my project.


So it was back to the drawing board. After much consideration, I decided to change the platform of my project. Rather than pursuer a TV show, I would create a magazine. Although this decision greatly changed many aspects of my project, the large objectives stayed the same; I was still dedicated to delivering news as objectively as possible while serving to empower and educate women. It seemed as if I had made sleigh progress in my project. At first, my decision to pursue a magazine seemed to leave with me just as many questions as I had before, but after lots of thought, I had started to make some progress. I found some websites to make magazines on. I did some research about powerful women. I had some ideas about what I wanted to write about. Progress! I was making progress! But every time it came down to opening up my computer and actually writing something….I still couldn’t do it. And so here I am, writing a blog post about my inability to write my magazine instead of actually writing my magazine. But I have a purpose. I am writing this post to reassure any writer who has found that the more progress they make with a project, the farther they seem to be from the finish line, that they are not alone. Even as a project begins to take shape, it can become even more daunting to begin it. Perhaps this is because we are nervous that our actual product will not meet the expectations we had set in place with our imagined project. Nevertheless, I hope I am not alone in having some fears about beginning my Capstone, and I have a strong feeling that tomorrow is the day I will finally put pen to paper.

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