Lifeguard

I am drowning
and I am the lifeguard refusing to jump in.
I’m letting her flail and grasp for anything
but the water slips through her fingers as
her eyes
get wider with fear

I am drowning.
Struggling to keep her head above the water
she gasps for
air
but gets a mouthful of water instead–
and I am watching it.

I am drowning.
and I am the water filling her lungs
pulling her deeper
energy depleting
she’s losing hope
and I am the lifeguard watching it.

I am drowning and I am the water and I am the lifeguard and it’s all my fault.

#DreamJournal

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